Are you experiencing anxiety about a situation in your life?
Are you feeling worry?
Well where are you? Now that might sound like a weird question. You might say, “I’m in my front room.”
Ok… how about this question then: Where is your mind? Now you might say, “Umm… in my head silly!”
But when you feel anxiety about something or worry – your mind is… in the FUTURE.
Chances are you are feeling anxiety or worry over some circumstance that has not happened yet. Something has occurred and now you are forecasting scenarios. This is causing those icky emotions.
Icky emotions are icky because at the base, we feel out of control. We feel like something is looming and is GOING to happen to us (hint – future word there in ‘going’).
And when these icky feelings take over it is very easy to spiral downwards. We’ve all done it. One bad thing makes us think of other bad things. And then we think of multiple bad scenarios for each of those bad things. And pretty soon we are stuck in such a quagmire it becomes really hard to see anything positive or even take action to change things.
How do we feel better? Usually it is by feeling in control again. And guess what the only thing you have control over is? That’s right, the PRESENT. This moment, right now.
Think about it. All you can control is what is happening now… in this second.
You are not in control of the past. That has already happened. There is no going back and changing it.
The future hasn’t happened yet. How are you going to control it? You may influence it. And how do you do that? By something you are doing in the PRESENT (which, sorry to sound redundant, is the only thing you really have control over). See how that works?
So when you are feeling regret, or worry, or anxiety try these tips:
- Stop and just breathe. This will help to calm your mind.
- Start listing things you are grateful for. This is something that brings you to the present quickly. And it makes you smile. This is a great way to turn the tide from icky feelings to better feelings.
- Focus on the now. If something has happened just focus on this minute. Are you ok? Are you still breathing? Do you still have your wits about you? Then chances are, if you admit it, you are actually ok.
- Don’t catastrophize things! That is a very quick route to regret, worry and anxiety! The truth is you are spinning your wheels on those emotions over something that has not actually happened. That bad circumstance does not exist! And only you can make sure it does not come to pass by taking action. And taking action when? In the PRESENT (which, yes again, is the only thing you really have any control over).
When you bring your mind to the present you can regain control. This doesn’t mean that bad or unpleasant things aren’t going to happen. But by staying in the present you will have a clearer mind. This will allow you to problem solve, rather than catastrophize.
Create an action plan. When you are creating you are in the present. And then take it one step at a time. Stay active in the moment. And those icky emotions will be kept at bay.
This takes practice, so don’t worry if you find yourself freaking out from time to time. Just stop and bring your mind to the present. Remember this is where you have control.
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Just include this complete statement with the content: A. Lynn Jesus, CEO and Purpose Expert with Thriveology, is dedicated to helping people discover their purpose and live life on their terms. Are you ready to get started? Stop going through the motions and find your Why with her FREE guidebook The Life (and Sometimes Coma) of Why.